How to play.

Be the first player to get rid of all your cards. Simple as that.

• The deck has 74 cards: 16 balls, 46 shafts (including action & wild cards), 11 heads, and 1 Asshole.
• Each player is dealt 6 cards.
• Remaining cards form the draw pile.
• 2–8 players · 10–20 minutes · 18+

The first player must play a balls card. No nob can begin without balls. If you don't have one, play passes until someone does.

Every nob grows from balls → shaft(s) → head. Cards connect on a 2D grid — up, down, left, or right. Shafts can chain together for longer nobs. A head directly on balls (no shaft) is a chode — small is celebrated. All nobs are welcome here.

Colour must match colour. Every connection must be between two matching colour connectors — pink, green, orange, or cyan. White/blank edges cannot connect to anything. A coloured connector can never touch a blank edge.

Wild cards have no colour and can connect to any colour connector. But they must still connect to something — they can't be placed freely. Wild Head (#29), Wild Shaft (#30), Wild Balls (#31), and The Four Skin (#61) — the Swiss army nobs. The Four Skin is a four-headed wild beast that takes any colour from any side.

• Knotted Shaft (Skip) — skip the next player's turn. Must still be played legally on a matching connector.
• Looped Shaft (Reverse) — reverses the direction of play. Must still be played legally on a matching connector.
• Magic 8-Ball (also known as the Octogonad) — every other player must pick up one card. The ultimate power move.

The Asshole is the wildcard of wildcards. It can be placed in any empty grid space — but only where none of its edges touch a colour connector. Blank to blank only.

When played, you choose one other player who must pick up a card. Playing it counts as your turn.

• Must play. If you can legally play a card, you must. No holding on to your nobs illegally.
• Can't play. If you have no legal play, pick up one card from the draw pile and your turn ends.
• Card rotation. You can rotate any card before playing it — 90° at a time — to find new connection possibilities.

What counts as "open"?

• A shaft connector facing an empty cell — the nob needs extending or capping.
• A balls connector facing an empty cell — the nob hasn't even started growing yet.
• Head connectors facing empty space are NOT open — heads are sealed ends.

If none of your cards can legally play on the open connectors, you draw. Even if you have balls in your hand — you cannot start fresh. You wait.

If every single nob on the board has been completed — every open connector capped with a head — then and only then may a new nob be started. The next player plays a balls card on any empty space adjacent to the board — no colour connection needed. This is the one and only time a card can be placed without a matching connection.

• Finish with a head. Your last card must be a head that completes a nob. If your last card is a shaft or balls, you must draw until you can finish properly.
• Stalemate. If no player can legally play and there are still open nobs, the game ends immediately. The player with the fewest cards wins. Ties share the win.

Not satisfied? If everyone has blue balls, the game continues after the first player finishes. Play keeps going until everyone has got rid of their cards (or stalemate kicks in). For those who need a longer session.